Last night I was a bit wiped out. I have no clue what caused it
it's not like I had a rough work day or anything
but on the way home I was yawning in my car and when I finally got home I just slumped into bed and snoozed for a couple of hours. I woke up around 8:30 and made myself some French toast. The toast was made from blueberry bread; however once it was battered and fried I could not really taste any blueberries in it. So live and learn. I sat in front of my FREE GIANT TV and ate them while I watched cartoons. Wow
just like Saturday morning.
Just before I went to bed my phone started buzzing. It was the guy I had bought the dreamwriters from off of ebay. The UPS man had been trying to deliver them to my house
but of course there was no one there to sign for them. I had him reroute them to my work address. That was pretty nice of him. I am looking forward to playing with this model of dreamwriter. The auction said they were not working
however it was 5 of them for nine dollars
so I think that out of all of them I will be able to get at least one working. I wanted to try out this particular model because it has a backlit screen.
Meanwhile a friend sent me a goody box in the mail
but because I have the world's laziest mailman he just sticks pink slips in my mailbox instead of getting off his ass and putting it on my back porch. It's not like I have to sign for it or anything. I think he does it to make his route faster so that he can go snooze under a tree with a big jug marked XXX.
I had a bizarre dream last night that someone I knew was listening to a possessed Teddy Ruxpin doll that was telling him to kill the maid. Turns out the maid was some cute girl
so I saved her by smashing the Teddy Ruxpin doll. However
that set off some huge chain of events that led to a carnival
my old dorm room
and my odd eyed cat getting lost in Saudi Arabia.
This morning on the way to work I thought of something I wanted to write about
however I think the bright fluorescent lights of my work actually burn away creativity the way sunlight burns up a vampire. For the life of me I cannot think of what I was going to say. Oh well. It was nothing important.
2026 Update
Setting the dial for March 2006: Ed's slumped, making blueberry French toast, and hunting dead word processors.
Ah, 2006. A world where a free giant TV is a marvel, where a man can buy five dead word processors for nine dollars and believe at least one will rise from the slab, and where the postal service leaves a pink slip instead of doing its one job. Twenty years later, all of that has curdled into something else. Your dreamwriter's backlit screen is now the least magical object in every pocket; the glow that once felt futuristic is now just the low-grade radiation of doomscroll. Package deliveries have become an entire theater of porch pirates, app notifications, and blurry photos of a box left near the trash. The lazy mailman has mostly been replaced by a lazy algorithm that tells you it attempted delivery while you were standing at the front door. Even your fluorescent work lights now have competition from at-home offices lit by 'warm' LEDs that still burn away creativity, but with more subscriptions. And the Teddy Ruxpin? If he existed today, he would be an AI plush demanding a monthly fee for vaguely sinister storytelling.
“2006 Ed, why did you gamble nine dollars on five non-working dreamwriters for a backlit screen, and when the possessed Teddy Ruxpin started giving murder advice, did you really think smashing the doll would end the chain of events?” — Beelzebubba the Third
2006 Ed: Well, Beelzebubba, first off, nine bucks for five dead dreamwriters is a bargain no matter how you slice it. Even if only one of them wakes up, I've got a backlit screen for less than the price of a pizza, and if none of them work, I've got a pile of interesting guts to poke at. That's a win either way, and I've spent nine dollars on stupider things, trust me. As for the possessed Teddy Ruxpin, no, I didn't think smashing it would wrap things up. In dream logic you just go with the first obvious move, then the plot twists and suddenly your odd-eyed cat is lost in Saudi Arabia. That's how dreams work. You smash the doll, save the maid, and then you're at a carnival in your old dorm room. I woke up before the cat made it home, so I guess we'll never know.
