I was pleased to see that my Swedish Snus arrived in the mail last night.
For those that do not know, snus (pronounced snoose) is a Swedish tobacco product. It comes in little tea bags and is placed in the upper lip. It is different from American ’dip’ and ’chewing tobacco’ as it is steam-cured rather than fire-cured, it is not fermented. Because it is steam-cured, rather than fire-cured like smoking tobacco or other chewing tobacco, it contains lower concentrations of nitrosamines and other carcinogens that do bad stuff to your body.
Also because of the way it is prepared, it does not cause you to salivate, so there is no redneck spitting. In fact no juices at all leak out of the bag, unless you have had it in your mouth for two long. You just pop it in and enjoy nicotine goodness.
Camel has been tentatively testing a snus product in a couple of states, Florida being one of them. They come in three flavors, original, ’frost’ and ’spice’. A couple of weeks ago I made the switch from cigarettes to snus. I was amazed at how easily I made the switch. Whenever I am sitting at my desk or work or sitting at home and a cig urge fires up, I pop in a snus bag and then suddenly everything in hunky-dory again. http://media.cnbc.com/j/CNBC/Sections/News_And_Analysis/_News/__EDIT%20Englewood%20Cliffs/snus_tins.small.jpg
I did some reading online about how popular snus is in Sweden. There are a wide variety of snus flavors available and to my amusement I saw that even with the shipping from Sweden, the Swedish snus is still cheaper than the camel brands by a dollar or more. Curious, I picked several different flavors to try out.
Considering I picked ordinary post as shipping, I was still amazed at how fast it arrived. About five working days. I had gotten eight cans of different brands and flavors. As soon as they arrived I put them in the freezer. Snus has to be treated like a food product because it can go rancid. In fact those little snus displays you see at 7-11 are actually little refrigerators.
I tried my first one on the way to work this morning, Offroad brand ’IceMint’. The bags are larger than the American ones, apparently the American ones are considered ’mini’. The bags are also wetter. Not really soggy, but slightly damp. The mint taste is lighter than what was in the camel frost, but had more of a ’real’ mist taste rather than artificial. The camel brands taste sort of like gum.
With the camel minis I can have one in my cheek and no one can notice it, however with the full Swedish version there is a noticeable bulge. The nicotine content seems to be higher, too. I was driving to work as it seeped its magic into me, and all I could think was ’aaaahh’. This is good stuff.
One can will last me a couple of days, so it will take me a while to get through the others. I have fun flavors like ’Apple’ and ’Cranberry’ and ’Rape’. Nothing taste as good as rape does.
Why don’t I quit all tobacco?
Shut up, that’s why.
2026 Update
Time machine set for March 17, 2008, when Ed's nicotine habit goes international and his freezer turns into a tobacco vault.
Ah, 2008, when a man could mail-order tobacco from Sweden like he was ordering rare cheese, stash it in the freezer next to the Hungry-Man dinners, and drive to work with a pioneering bulge under his lip. You were amazed a package arrived in only five days; now we track every parcel by phone and complain if it is not same-day. Snus itself has been gentrified beyond recognition: what began as wet, refrigerated, mail-order Swedish pouches now exists as dry little nicotine discs in every gas station, aggressively marketed as tobacco-free and discreet, as if that fooled your gums. The whole ritual is cleaner, whiter, more corporate—no freezer, no rancid threat, no shipping from Stockholm, just a QR code and a subscription. You were ahead of your time, Ed, but you were also of your time: you called the product good stuff and then ended the post with “Shut up, that’s why.” That is a perfect 2008 artifact: unhurried, unmoderated, and unbelievably self-aware.
“2008 Ed, when you typed out your “fun flavors” list and included that third flavor, did you not once think about how it would look to a future audience? And was it really worth declaring it the best-tasting one on a blog your mother could have found?” — Beelzebubba the Third
2008 Ed: Egads, Beelzebubba, you had to go and bring my mother into it, didn’t you? Okay, look. When I typed out “Rape” I was sitting there with my head full of nicotine and Swedish product names, and in my defense, it’s pronounced “rah-peh,” it’s just a snus brand, not a statement. But I’d be lying if I said I pictured anyone outside my own skull ever reading that list. And no, I didn’t think how it looked. That’s sort of my superpower: not thinking. The whole blog’s like a dumpster fire of poor judgment, and that line’s just the charred toaster on top. Was it worth declaring it the best-tasting? Probably not. Moxie gave me a look when I wrote it, and she’s a cat. So there you go. I’m going to go pop in an Apple and pretend this conversation never happened.
