Gost attacks and of wine and retards.

For about two seconds this morning I thought I was having a supernatural experience.

When not using my toaster, I store it on to of my fridge. On the floor next to the fridge is a large metal bowl I keep filled with water so the cat's can get a drink. This morning, like most Sunday mornings, I was standing in my kitchen in my underwear, blearily glaring down at my little coffee pot as it filled with sweet, sweet coffee.

Unknown to me, when I had gotten the sugar out of the freezer I had slammed the door and had left the toaster teetering on it's edge. As I was standing before the coffee pot with my back turned, the toaster had fallen off the fridge, hitting the edge of the metal bowl, which had caused it to catapult a good deal of catspit-water all over my bare back.

Now, from my perspective, I was watching the coffee pot, only half awake, when I suddenly hear this weird loud metallic sound, and before I could turn around, a quick and very cold sensation suddenly covered my back. I was highly startled and for a brief moment I thought some supernatural being with the bodily consistency of 'slimer' from ghost busters had suddenly attached itself to my back and was about to do something very bad, like anal rape me. If I had to choose over an alien probe or an ectoplasmic anal raping, I'll choose the aliens any day.

I spun around and saw the toaster on the floor in a puddle of water (no it's not plugged in) and I finally pieced two and two together. Then I was simply irritable because I had to sob up water from the floor.

I dropped by my folks house for lunch. They had just gotten back from a trip to Vegas. My uncle cheerfully told me that he had seen a bum pass out and fall off a bunch. The whole time they were up there my Dad had a terrible cold and thus could not go to the noodie bar. I'm glad my dad is going to retire soon, he has been doing a lot of traveling, and every time he hits the airport, AKA 'The Great Germ Nexus' he always ends up with some new cold. That's gotta suck.

Last night I watched 'The Exorcism of Emily rose'. I thought it was pretty good, at least I thought some of the scenes were freaky. Like when he awoke in the middle of the night and had seen her twisted into a spooky pose. I would have prodded her with a stick or something before I went over to her.

I need to make some stew for lunch tomorrow. I am using my usual croc-pot stew recipe, but just for a change I bought lamb chunks instead of beef. So tomorrow for lunch ill have some lamb stew. Baaah.

Mike was kind enough to drop me off a bottle of San Sebastian wine while I was glutting myself at the folk's house. It's really good wine and when he told me he found some at publix, I hit two publix's in the area and could not find any. At the second one I almost short-circuited some retard's brain. When I went to the checkout, the girl ringing up my purchase asked me if I had found everything ok. I said 'No, I heard a rumor of some wine that was in stock, but could not find any.

The bag boy was some pudgy black retarded guy, and after I said that sentence, he looked up sharply at me and started going 'bidaBidaBidabiDa bida-b-bb-bbbbb…WINE?' with a clearly surprised look on his face. I looked over and even the cashier girl stopped what she was doing and looked over at him. Alarmed that I might have set something off in his brain, I assure him that I was actually just fine. He seemed to calm down and I looked at the cashier girl who looked a little relived. However, I did not get any wine. So it was cool mike grabbed me one.

I got a half-moon cookie from that publix. It was OK. However, cookies never taste as good as they do in memories.





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